Today was my first day in full teach with the 2nd graders...I am so tired, but its a good tired (The kind of tired you have after finishing a great race) Accomplished tired - the kind of tired you have because you have been so productive and you have accomplished so much that now you are just worn out. When you have this kind of tired you are content with being tired rather than frustrated because you are proud of the process that wore you out.
With the pregnancy I have realized that I am going to be tired almost always but most always I am frustrated by it - I have always been used to just going...always - Running, house chores, school, bills, the dogs, everything...now my big belly has become like a big stop sign that yells at me to stop whenever I get going. When I am faced with pain or fatigue I would normally accept the challenge and push through it, and in the end love the feeling of triumph over my bodies desire for rest - different story now.
When Jeremy and I bought the pregnancy test I told him in the car that everything was going to totally change - it wasn't about us anymore...no more being selfish. I have come to realize that same statement applies to my desires to push through the fatigue. Its no longer about me getting my To-Do-List accomplished at the expense of my rest, but about me listening to what my body (our baby's home) actually is telling me to do. Not an easy task-I don't like to listen when I am told what to do.
Rather than challenging the tired and enduring through the lack of rest, I am now challenged to accept my signs of exhaustion and endure through the unfinished To-Do-List. So for today I am enjoying my exhaustion...it is a good feeling today, a good tired.
Until next time,